A painfully self-conscious early adolescent can take this social cruelty very personally. "Being teased or rumored this way shows nothing wrong with you, but it shows a lot wrong about them.
They are ridiculing what they fear being attacked about themselves, and they are choosing to at mean.
There are as many good ways to be a man as there are men.
And your job is to discover and develop a good way to be womanly or manly that fits and fulfills the authentic person you want to become."A final word needs to be said about early puberty, a reality that affects girls a significant number of girls.
For girls hips broaden, breasts swell, menstruation begins, and they can produce eggs.
An easy way to do this is for parents to search online for sites explaining puberty, find one that they like, and then read the information with their son or daughter, inviting any questions the young person may have. Parents notice the negative attitude (more criticism and complaining), the passive and active resistance (more delay and arguments), and the testing of limits (more seeing what can be gotten away with) that are the hallmarks of early adolescent change. For most young people, puberty catches them at a bad time - during the early adolescent years (around ages 9 - 13) when they are separating from the shelter of childhood and begin striving for social belonging and place among their society of peers.
Normalize the process so the young person doesn't ‘abnormalize' themselves. But when puberty does begin, the adolescent transformation becomes emotionally intensified and more complex. First, it creates a process problem: how to manage the physical changes that are besetting their bodies. And second, it creates an outcome problem: how to act young manly or young womanly. Already feeling adrift from family and at sea in this brave new world of more social independence, puberty demonstrates how they are also out of control of their body.
Even so, these are not the most commanding images at hand.
It is the cultural ideals for being a man and being a woman that young people find most alluring, ideals portrayed in the images and messages and icons that media advertising and entertainment constantly communicate.